Your parents have decided that they do not wish to be married anymore. This could be for a variety of different reasons, but you are not one of those reasons. Their divorce is NOT your fault. 

In most cases children live with both parents on an alternating schedule. Your parents will work to create a schedule that best fits your activity and school schedule. These living schedules can vary wildly based on where your parents are living, how busy they are with work, and where your activities fall.

If your parents move further away from your current school, you might have to change. Your parents will try to work out a schedule that works best for you. This may include a new school that is closer to your parents’ new location. For more information on the location changes you might experience, click here. 

Hopefully, you can keep seeing your friends. Your parents may or may not move away, so it may become harder for you to hang out with your friends. That being said, you can stay in contact with them and try to organize time to hang out on the weekends or online.

In most cases you will not go to court. Most judges won’t even allow you to testify or come into the courtroom. Try to stay out of your parents’ divorce and avoid being caught in the middle. If you want to talk to the judge about your custody preferences, your parents or the court may ask for a Child and Family Investigator or CFI. A CFI is an investigator who makes recommendations involving the child’s best interests. 

Your relationship with your parents moving forwards is not completely up to you, but you have control over how you communicate and respond. You can continue to hang out, talk, watch movies, play games, hike, and do other activities with your parents. Responding in calm, respectful manners is important, but expressing your emotions is just as equally important. A therapist is a great person to have conversations and ask for help as you go through this event. You can rely on them for advice on how your relationship with your parents is and will continue to be. However, just because they got divorced doesn’t mean you should be rude or distant, they are still your parents. Remember their problems should not be your problems.